If these things sound familiar then you're probably a snob.
- Your food or drink orders contains three or more steps e.g. “Low fat,” “decaf,” “no foam,” “extra hot,” “on the side,” “no mayo,” “very annoying.” You get the idea.
- You must have the latest and greatest gadget, do-hickey, or thingamabob, in whatever area of recreation/hobby you enjoy. i.e. You are a tech snob, so you pre-ordered the iPad, before it could even be pre-ordered and then proceeded to traipse around town singing about its coolness. Same goes for clothes, cars, pretty much anything.
- You have a secret rating scale, rating everything from peoples clothing, to coworkers performance, to your friend’s spouses or significant others. They get a passing grade, or an 8 out of 10, or a thumbs down.
- You avoid, via manipulation or strategy, visiting certain establishments that you deem uncool. Your mom says “Lets go to Olive Garden for dinner.” You say (manipulatively), “Or let’s try that new place Olive and Ivy (a delicious local joint)…it still has the word “olive” in the title,” thereby secretly advancing your own restaurant agenda.
- You purport to be an expert in certain areas, even with no formal training or education, simply because you like these things and think that you have earned the right to be an “expert.” For instance, you pretend essentially, to be an expert on movies, and say things like “Well, his first film was quite avant-garde, very noir, but his second film, in my opinion falls short, both in terms of direction and plot.” Umm, can anybody say “snobbish”?
- No one knows exactly how you might respond to a new trend or event because you yourself don’t even know yet. Not until you have witnessed or experienced something fully can you make up your mind…then and only then will something be worthy of your praise, or not. You can not be persuaded by others either. You decide if something is cool. You and you alone.
- You exclaim that certain duties are not within your job description. For example, you don’t do dishes, or yard work, or fetch coffee, or file papers, or clean windows, or change diapers, or whatever it is you refuse to do.
- You have or have had people refer to you as “stuck up”, “snobbish”, “elitist”, or “generally snooty”.
- You avoid tends simply because they are trendy. If everyone likes it you reason, then it must not be very cool. If Glee is en vogue, then out it goes. If Lady Gaga is hot, you find her cold.
- You tend to state the obvious but say it in such a way as to sound well-informed and ahead of the curve. For example, “Today is going to be hot and sunny, so we should sit in the shade.” Meanwhile those with you are sweating and panting, quite aware that it is hot and sunny.
There you have it, just a few ways to tell if you too might be a snob. Don’t worry, this list does not reflect upon your character. I personally like a little bit of snob in everyone. It keeps things interesting.