Things women know who married their dream man.
The Full Story:
Your wedding night is super content. Maybe you have ~crazy~ wedding night sex, or maybe you just collapse in a pile of tulle and satin and pass out eating pizza (because you totally forgot to eat at your wedding), but whatever you do, you feel content in knowing you spent one of the most magical days of your life with one of the most magical people you know.
Your honeymoon is blissful AF. The post-wedding high continues throughout whatever you choose to do for your honeymoon — whether it's relax on the beaches of Hawaii, climb Machu Picchu, or just staycation at your place; you're even more sure about marrying this person than you were when you initially said yes.
He knows you are his equal. Whatever your roles are in the relationship; they are equal. He's thoughtful about gender roles, and doesn't expect you to do the typical "womanly" things, and you don't expect him to do the typically "manly" things. Well, unless you both want to, but the point is, you talk and think about it and settle on something that works, and he's totally down to do the dishes if that's what works for you.
He's good about doing the things that matter to you. Like, maybe he leaves toast in the toaster, but he also knows to *never* leave crumbs in the sink because a dirty sink legit makes you feel bonkers. He knows what's important to you, and you know what's important to him, and those are the things you're hardcore about.
You get a little thrill when you introduce him as your husband. Most often I introduce my husband by just his name, but every once in a while, when the occasion permits, I introduce him as my husband. And, you guys, I'm not kidding when I say I get a little bit of an orgasmic sensation.
You think more about picking a fight with him, and vice versa. Don't get me wrong — every couple fights (well, unless you've been "Weekend at Bernies-ing" your husband). But when you're married, it's a lot harder to start a battle royale over a piece of toast he left in the toaster. You just toss it out, and know that he does lots of little, annoying things for you all the time. When you think about it that way; it's a lot easier to let the s**t that doesn't matter slide.
You can't even imagine not being married to him. It's pretty simple, but when you think about life without him, it's much worse. Not in a "ugh I don't want to be single and start again!"-type way, but in a "You make my life so much better"-type way. You're with them because you want to be, and not because you need to be. That really clarifies after marriage to the right person.
You feel better about yourself when you're around him. Self-confidence comes from within, no doubt, but when someone else feels as confident in you as you feel in yourself — that's a next-level high. You can do anything! You're the best!
You're hella proud of him. You look at his accomplishments and feel total, unmitigated pride. You know you didn't give birth to him, but like, sometimes you kinda feel like you did? You are that proud of him, because he is somebody to be proud of.
The way he looks at you. You know that look — it's not necessarily sexual (although it can be sometimes!) — that's like, "Damn. You are AMAZING." He looks at you that way sometimes — maybe it's cause you spent your day volunteering, or got a score on a video game, or told a funny joke at a party. He admires you, and is proud of you, and thinks you're the s**t. That look.
He doesn't try to change you, and you don't try to change him. Listen, if you got to the marriage point, you both kinda know what you came for. Sure, you can want each other to strive and succeed and become better people together, but as my father-in-law says, "Laura, you can't turn a cat into a dog." If you married a shy person, you know you're never gonna be with a golden retriever. (That's not what you want, anyway — always jumping on laps, and sniffing crotches! I mean, that's fine if it's what you're into, but it's not what I signed up for.)
You can talk about sex openly. Sex lives ebb and flow, and so it's cool to have a husband who's willing to talk about it. You feel comfortable sharing what you're both into, because you're the most ~sexually-progressive~ married couple on the block.
He has your back. I am not happy to share this disgusting story, but I feel it's important. A couple years ago, a bout of food poisoning hit me in the middle of a party. My stomach was a-churnin', and I felt like I wanted to be alone with a toilet until I passed out. My husband rushed me out of the party and on the drive home, told me, "If you have any sort of an accident right now, I won't tell anyone!" I am happy to report that I did not have an "accident" (barf) but if I had, I knew my (humiliating) secret would be safe with him. (And now whenever I'm like, "I have to go to the bathroom," my husband likes to say, "If you have any sort of an accident right now, I won't tell anyone!" It is a gross inside joke, which brings me to number #14:)
He loves when you're weird, and he's super weird around you, too. You have your own world of communication, and it would be a little humiliating if anyone else ever saw it. But, basically, this man would go down a rabbit hole of making up Muppet voices for an alternate universe version of the show for hours. (It doesn't have to be that, but you know what I'm saying. You can be super weird together in a way that you probably haven't been since you were a kid. It's the most fun.)
He's in the bunker with you. Life is hard — unexpected expenses, injuries, and deaths make our time on Earth a real rollercoaster. I think the real definition of dream husband is someone you trust to be there for you when that ish hits the fan. And you want to be there for him, too.
You're on the same page about kids. As in, whether to have them or not. A man can be your dream husband in every way, but if he sees himself with three little bambinos, and you see yourself with zero little bambinos, a dream husband for you, he does not make.
Everything feels the same, but better. When I married my husband, we'd already lived together and been dating for six years, so I expected life after the wedding to be the same as it ever was. I was right and wrong. Things were pretty much the same, but everything was a little bit heightened, in a good way. It is the same, but better.