According to guys, here are things that scare them away!
TOO MUCH TEXTING This is a common mistake that a lot of women tend to make early in a relationship. Yes, we enjoy texting with you, but it doesn’t need to happen 24/7. Perhaps more importantly, not every thought you have needs to be shared via text. Texting us too much can make us feel a little smothered and give us the impression that you’re trying to push the relationship into being too serious too soon. For most guys, that’s a turn-off.
GOING CRAZY ON SOCIAL MEDIA Unless you’re in college, you don’t live your whole life on social media. More importantly, most guys don’t want their new relationship unfolding online for the entire world to see. Honestly, you don’t have to “like” every single thing we post on Facebook/Instagram/Twitter. It’s a little juvenile and it doesn’t really mean anything other than that you need to get a hobby. It’s not that we don’t like you, but it doesn’t mean we want to make a big deal out of it on the internet.
NOT HAVING YOUR OWN FRIENDS Just because we enjoy being with you doesn’t mean we need to spend every waking moment together. Two people in a relationship should still have lives outside of that relationship, and that means spending time with friends. If a woman doesn’t have friends of her own, she usually gets too clingy, as if she can’t survive a night alone without her boyfriend. This may seem cute at first, but it gets annoying that you want to tag along everywhere because you don’t have your own group of friends.
GETTING JEALOUS Being jealous of us spending time with people who aren’t you is a great way to scare a guy off. We had a life before we started dating you and we want to continue to hang out with those people. It’s not a big deal. If you get jealous every time we go somewhere or do something without you, it shows that you’re insecure, which isn’t a good look on anyone.
PLAYING 20 QUESTIONS ABOUT EVERY LITTLE THING Yes, it’s good to get to know each other, but there are other ways to have a conversation without bombarding us with questions about every little topic that pops up. After a while, it feels more like an interview than a date, and most guys aren’t going to stick around long enough for another one.
BEING TOO FRIENDLY WITH OTHER PEOPLE This one can be a little tricky. It’s nice that you’re outgoing and kind to other people, but there’s a fine line between being friendly and flirting right in front of us. Most guys aren’t going to enjoy the latter. If it feels like you’re flirting with other guys, we’re going to get jealous, insecure, and want to bail on the relationship before it gets started.
HAVING NO INTERESTS No offense intended here, but there’s something a little off about a woman with no real interests or hobbies. Just for the record, binge-watching Netflix doesn’t count as a hobby. If you don’t have any real interests or passions, the relationship is going to get stale in a hurry. If things are that boring at the start of a relationship, we’re not going to hang around too long.
LETTING LITTLE THINGS UPSET YOU Most guys don’t want you to listen to you complain about every little thing. Perhaps that’s part of your personality, but try to cool it as much as possible. We want to be around someone who’s positive and upbeat; we don’t want to start dating Debbie Downer. Naturally, this works both ways, as we assume you ladies don’t want to be around a grump.
ASSUMING WE’RE READY FOR COMMITMENT Any mention of the two of us getting married in the first six months of dating is way too premature and a great way to send us heading for the hills. There will be a time to talk about commitment, but let’s not get ahead of ourselves. If you haven’t heard, guys can sometimes freak out about making a commitment, so don’t assume we’re ready to jump into something serious right away.
HAVING AN EMOTIONAL FREAKOUT Unless you go through a truly life-changing experience, few things will scare off a guy faster than an emotional meltdown. Guys want someone who’s consistent and stable and freaking out over something that doesn’t necessarily warrant a freak-out can be a frightening thing to watch. It may seem like a cliché for a guy to bail on a woman because he thinks she’s crazy, but it happens, so don’t give him a reason to think that.
EXPECTING HIM TO PAY FOR EVERYTHING It’s not that we mind paying for things while we try to woo you, but just assuming that we’ll pay for everything isn’t an attractive quality. This is typically less of a problem nowadays, but expecting us to flip the bill every time out does indicate that you could be a gold digger, and that’s a problem.
TALKING TRASH ABOUT OTHER PEOPLE This is another unattractive quality that you don’t want to showcase to guys. Whether it’s your friends or other women, we don’t want to hear you say bad things about people just for fun. It makes us nervous about what you may say about us if we break up. It also makes you seem a little catty and jealous, which isn’t cool. If your idea of a good conversation is complaining about other people, most guys will pass and look for someone with a sunny disposition.