Be ready to travel: know your plane etiquette

Share with me an important piece of "plane etiquette"!

  • Refrain from cologne or perfume. But you damn well better be wearing as much deodorant as your body can possibly be covered with.
  • No smelly food.
  • Asking person behind you if it’s okay to lower seat is nice
  • Middle seat gets both arm rests.
  • Get off in your row order, unless you may miss your connection - which you then need to say to people.
  • Your bag needs to be above your row or as close as possible. Do NOT get on the plane and stow your bag in the front when you’re sitting in the back so you can “grab it on the way out.” It throws everything off and then bags start going everywhere.
  • Leaving screaming kids at home, i.e. DRIVE.
  • Headphones or earbuds means I'm not open to neighborly small talk, probably because I'm exhausted.
  • Go to the bathroom if you have to pass gas.
  • You’re in public. Don’t get on the plane in pajamas.
  • NO clipping of anything allowed ever, under any circumstances.
  • You may bring your own food on the plane, as long as its aroma does not waft further than your own seat. You may not bring tuna under any circumstances.
  • The window shade is the sole purview of the person in the window seat.
  • Do not lift the armrests to give yourself more space unless you’ve asked permission. (I once flew with a large gentleman on my lap because he assumed he could spread out.)
  • Don’t “manspread,” (or “womanspread,” for that matter) - you need space pay for an upgrade.
  • No nail polish!!
  • Keep your kid from kicking the seat back in front of him/her and, for the love of God, put earphones or earbuds on them if they are watching videos or playing games. None of us business travelers want to listen to your kid’s cartoons during the flight.
  • EVERYONE should use their inside voices on the plane AND at the gate. I don’t need to hear your VERY IMPORTANT cell phone call, thanks.
  • Don’t sleep/snore on your neighbor’s shoulder
  • If you have the window seat and need to use the bathroom, please make sure your seat neighbors are not sleeping when you have to go across them. Please tap them to ask them to move so you can get out.


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