Here is how to play it cool with your crush.
What is double texting? Double texting is a concept in dating like any other. It is the rule that you aren’t ever supposed to text someone unless they text you back equally, which means there shouldn’t be a whole lot of blue, blue, blue, blue followed by a short blip of white.
When you over-text a person you like, it is like giving them TMI, or talking to the point of giving someone a headache. Texting is a tool that is great for dating, but only if you understand the rules and follow them. Double texting is a way that you only give as much in a conversation attention-wise as they do. It is a way to ensure that you aren’t coming off too overzealous or needy.
Here are some rules for double texting.
#1 Never have your line of text more than theirs. If you have a paragraph and their answer is one word, then you are coming on way too strong. Texts are read as if someone is talking to you. Your rambling can be heard on the message of a keyboard, and you can be overdoing it. Keep it simple stupid, is your mantra until you get to a phase in your relationship where the games have ended, and you won their heart.
#2 Never text back before you get an answer. I know it is so difficult to text someone and then sit and wait. Just like in the day when a guy would tell me, “Hey I’ll call you” and I would sit by my rotary phone all day *which totally sucked because I literally couldn’t go anywhere*. If you text them, you can’t text them again, and I mean absolutely can’t, until they return your text message, even if it is just an emoji. A response is grounds for a reply. No response is grounds for, well, no response.
#3 If you haven’t gotten an answer, then wait… don’t ever make the mistake of thinking maybe he or she didn’t see it, he or she did. One of the hardest things to do in life is to wait. We wait at stop lights, we wait for electricity when it goes out due to a storm, we wait at the doctor’s office.
All good things have to be waited for. If you really are interested in this person, then you have to control yourself and wait until they give you an answer, any answer. We can convince ourselves of anything if we want to. If you think to yourself, “maybe the internet wasn’t working, and my iMessage didn’t go through, or that they just got busy, read your text, and forgot to answer… stop it. If you were important enough and they were as into you as you are them, then they would not have “forgotten” or would text to see why you haven’t texted them. You know what is right even if you don’t want to accept it. Go with your head and not your wishes.
#4 Never text late at night or at an off hour, or you could be waiting FOREVER to get a message back. If you text late at night when you’re not sure if they are going to get it that day or the day after, then you are setting it up so that they aren’t going to text you back right away. What happens if you don’t text right away? Sometimes you forget, and it keeps getting pushed back, and, before you know it, days have gone by. If you want to increase the likelihood that they will text you back quickly, and you can have a conversation, try to pick a time of day where they won’t be busy or distracted. That way, you can increase the chances that you can get a little more than just a word or two.
#5 If you are going to text, be straight forward and not wishy-washy if you’re waiting for an answer like NOW. If you want to get an answer, then don’t be vague. Sometimes when you text someone something completely meaningless and vague, they aren’t sure if they are supposed to answer it or if it is just some information that you are sending. If you are going to send along something you saw that was funny, make sure to include a caption that indicates you are expecting some sort of answer like “what do you think?” That way, they know that you are looking for a response.
#6 Keep the texting going by asking easy and fun questions instead of getting too serious. If you want to get something back from them or a double text, make sure to keep the conversation light and non-confrontational.
When you come on too strong or hit a nerve, the other person can simply put their phone down and walk away leaving you with a text hanging that doesn’t get answered. From there, you can’t text anymore, and it is like being stuck in the mud. If you want to keep the double texting going, make sure to make them want to engage by not getting too serious.
To sum it up, double texting is a dating theory where you can’t text someone until or unless, they text or text you back. Like for like, if you ramble on, continue to send texts that go unanswered, or bombard their messages with s**t, then you are going to run the risk of irritating them and turning them off. Never seem more eager than they are.