Guaranteed your coworkers hate when you do these ten things.
Your coworkers may not be your best friends, and that’s fine. But if all of your coworkers hate you and you don’t work for Monsters Inc., chances are all your coworkers aren’t the problem: You are. Here are a few ways you might be making your coworkers absolutely detest you without even realizing it.
Chew or snap your gum loudly. Remember Vivian’s best friend from Pretty Woman? That was super unprofessional, which may be one of the many complex reasons why she’s probably still working the streets while Viv is married to a zillionaire.
Heating fish in the microwave. You are the absolute worst.
Or just eating fish or something equally odious in an open office space. Either go outside or to the cafeteria or take it home for dinner later. Don’t nauseated everyone else.
Gossiping. Even non-work gossip is annoying. I recently learned that someone at my job’s social media team has been “hanging out” with a guy since January and she’s like, really annoyed that they don’t have a title yet. Three things: One, I don’t care but still have this knowledge in my mind forever now. Two, if I overheard from across the office, chances are our boss did too. And three, he’s just not that into you or else he’d be your boyfriend by now, so please kindly shut the hell up or save it for a discreet text message that won’t impede on my ability to get my own work done.
Yelling into the phone. Unless the person on the other end specifically says she can’t hear you, trust that she can hear you. So can everyone else within a 20-foot radius.
Not being loud enough. If someone right next to you has to struggle to hear whatever you’re saying, it’s going to get annoying to have to stop whatever they’re doing to get up and hear something that’s probably irrelevant anyway. Gchat exists for a reason. So does your diaphragm. Use both wisely.
Having no sense of humor. If people feel like they have to walk on eggshells around you, especially if you aren’t even the boss, you’re not going to make any new friends in the office.
Crying. Listen, I get it. Once Sir Patrick Stewart and Sir Ian McKellen came into my office and we’re incredibly charming and adorable, and as soon as they left I started shaking and sobbing uncontrollably. It’s awkward for everyone. Go into the bathroom or take the day until you can collect yourself.
Skipping deodorant. And no, that rock crystal doesn’t work as well as you think it does. If you have legit hyper-hydrosis or extreme odor despite showering regularly and using antiperspirants, see a doctor for a prescription.
Replying all when unnecessary. Stop kissing ass so publicly. You’re not only transparent, you’re also a distraction to people who are competent and confident enough to not need a cookie for everything they accomplish in a day.