You said the BIG THREE WORDS...and got nada!! Now what!!

You said "I love you" and got ZERO response.....

#1 Know that it’s not your fault. You did nothing wrong. I know it can be difficult to understand that because you feel rejected. If somebody doesn’t love you, that’s on them. Either they aren’t in a place where they can love anybody, or they aren’t feeling the connection with you. It’s not your fault, and truly nobody is really at fault, per say. There is just a mixed connection somewhere.

#2 It could be poor timing. Maybe they are super into you, but they are going through a lot right now and don’t know how to respond to your “I love you.” Maybe they do feel the same way, but in the moment you tell them how you are feeling, they are overwhelmed with everything in their lives. Be sure to tell them in good time, and in a good situation. I know it can be difficult to tell at times, but do your best to tell them in an intimate setting.

#3 They might not love you yet. Just because they didn’t say “I love you” back, doesn’t mean they never will. Some people take longer to feel that sort of way, and even longer to express it. Don’t pressure them. Give them time and space to sort things out on their own. You definitely don’t want them to say “I love you” if they don’t actually mean it, right? Don’t put the pressure on them. Make sure they know that they can take their time coming to terms with their emotions.

#4 Understand that it doesn’t mean you have to break up. They didn’t say “I love you” back, but that doesn’t mean that they want to break up with you. It doesn’t mean you should assume that either. Maybe it was too soon for them *not necessarily for you* to say “I love you.” Again, be patient with them. Make sure you tell them that you don’t need to break up, because it might be assumed from one or both parties.

#5 Maybe you have different intentions. Perhaps you have different intentions. Do you want a serious relationship, and they just want to sleep with you? Consider this. Maybe they even gave you all of the signs, or even told you straight up but you ignored these signs because you so desperately wanted to make a relationship work with them. Be realistic. Don’t force a relationship with someone who doesn’t want one.

#6 You aren’t unlovable. When saying “I love you” and not hearing it back, it can be easy to assume that nobody could ever love you, but know that this is not true. It could be any of the listed reasons or a plethora of other reasons. Just let it go. You are loveable and you are amazing. You will find your partner in life and it will be magical, maybe this just wasn’t the right one for you.

#7 Give them their space. If you say “I love you” and they do not say it back, give them a couple of days to process it. Also, take a few days to process things yourself. What is the next step, what provoked you to say “I love you,” is there value in your relationship, etc.? “I love you” is a huge statement, so both take your time apart to understand what happens from here.

#8 Think about if you really meant it. I know this sounds crazy, but a lot of people use “I love you” as a means of keeping people in relationships. You might have said “I love you” just for the reaction, or because you wanted them to stick around for a little bit longer. Perhaps, you even hoped they would start giving you more attention


Jake and Woody

Jake and Woody

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