Everybody loses it with their kids sometimes and it doesn’t mean we’re bad parents, but it does raise stress levels and doesn’t really ever solve the issue. Parental meltdowns leave us feeling bad, but the way we respond in the aftermath really matters. We can react in a way that will help repair and strengthen our relationship with our kiddos and even make it less likely that it’ll happen again, according to Dr.Carla Naumburg,a clinical social worker and parenting coach who literally wrote the book on the subject, “How to Stop Losing Your Sh*t With Your Kids.” This is her advice.
1) Get calm- Even if your meltdown is over, you may not be calm yet, so make sure you are before you engage your kids. So as the parenting pro suggests, “worry about yourself first,” otherwise you’ll still be on a hair-trigger and so will your child and the minute they talk back or don’t apologize, you’ll lose it again.
2) Have compassion for yourself- Instead of beating yourself up for snapping at your child, try to cut yourself some slack. Remember these key things: parenting is hard for everyone and you’re not alone in your struggles, you don’t have to be perfect to be a good parent, and you can always, ALWAYS start over. This will help you calm down way more than trashing yourself.
3) Apologize- When you’re back on solid ground, you can say you’re sorry to your kid like this:
- Take responsibility and own your behavior, whatever your role was.
- Say you’re sorry. Simple as that.
- Make a plan to move forward, explain what you’re going to do differently and how it’ll help.
- Don’t promise you’ll never lose your temper again. You know it’s not true and so do your kids, so don’t say it.
Source:Lifehacker